Posted by: learningwoman | April 28, 2008


The house is tidy again, the guests have been and gone, A’s at work, S. is at school and Z. is sleeping after a busy morning of climbing up and down little ladders, sliding down slides and hiding in tents and tunnels. Phew!

I can’t tell you how grateful I am that the house is clean and mostly organised. I feel somehow liberated, as though all the’stuff’ was bogging me down. Now all I need to do is get some proper sleep and I can start feeling more optimistic about the world.

When I’ve had good sleep, I feel strong, energetic, excited by ordinary things, able to play noisy games, make cookies, go to the park, tackle study, go visiting, laugh at small, hitherto unnoticed things and generally feel great.

When I’m tired…. not so much ūüôā

Our guests were an old football friend of A’s, his new wife and their four-month-old baby. They came at eleven o’clock on Friday night and just stayed the one night.¬† A. was excited to see his friend and we were¬†happy for them to come.

The problem for me was that we had worked really hard before they got here to make the house habitable again after the redecorating stuff, and by the time they arrived I was already tired. We had cups of tea together until about 1am, then went to bed. Their babe slept soundly through the night, which was great and then Z. woke me up at 6am. 

He and I¬†had a nice, quiet morning together, til about 9am, when everyone else emerged from their rooms. Then I made coffee and breakfast, while everyone sat around chatting. No one offered to help. The blokes left for a football game and after showers etc.., I made lunch, which I ate at the table with friend’s wife. After which, she got up and wandered off, leaving me to clear up while she talked with her sister on the phone.

If these had been people I knew well, I might have said something, although maybe not, after all, it was just one morning..

Then I went into town with her, since her friend had cancelled, and we wandered about, buying things that she wanted to take home to Amsterdam.

The whole time, she gave me earnest and friendly¬†advice on how to travel with babies, how to manage with children and how painful giving birth actually is…………(!)

“When you travel with babies, you have to remember to make a list, or you might forget things.”

“When you have children, your life changes.” This into my eyes to make sure I understood. “You can’t just keep going on as you did before, you have to change everything.”

“Pregnancy is very uncomfortable. It’s a good idea to…” followed a list of suggestions…

If I’d had enough sleep, I’d have smiled at this stuff but I was sleep deprived and I wanted to bop her one! I felt like¬†reminding her that I actually have two children, have given birth and travelled many times with them, around the world, both as babies and young children! ¬†

I felt patronised and condescended to, which I very probably wouldn’t have allowed to happen had I had enough sleep. My sense of humour goes offline a bit when I’m completely and totally shattered!! ūüôā

Oh well, it’s done now. I’m sure she didn’t mean it.

Think I’ll have an early night tonight…


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